Friday, May 21, 2010

May 21 - Finally Some Answers

The day we’ve been waiting for has now come and gone. We now have some answers to lingering questions. While some still remain, mercifully it's obvious that Garrett's heart is healing and now, so is mine and Kathy's. Today, he Cowboy'd Up and then some. This boy has GRIT!

Tonight folks, we are faithfully confident that we have received what we have been praying for. Today was victorious, but not perfect. While we have a journey yet to complete the outlook is good. Garrett is now asleep once again beside me, and for the first time in a few weeks he doesn't have to worry about the biopsy. It's over. He is real uncomfortable with a lot of pain from the incision but his mind is quiet allowing him more peaceful rest when he can sleep. At least for now, he's not scared and I am grateful.

I woke Garrett at 4:15 this morning to let him have something to eat so he wouldn’t have to be so hungry all day. 5am was the latest he could have anything in his stomach before surgery. Of course that had to have a funny twist to it, too. Garrett and I were both up past 1am and our brains were moving like molasses in February. I poured him a bowl of cereal and being in an unfamiliar kitchen, grabbed a bowl of what I thought was sugar, putting a healthy dose on top of his snack. After taking one bite, Garrett’s face contorted to look like a freeze-dried shar pei puppy. I had unwittingly dispensed salt over his rice krispies instead of sugar! After we got the nasty taste out of his mouth, we both laughed our tails off. Anyway, he eventually got a “real” snack and we went back to sleep.

At about 8am the hospital folks called and told us they had an earlier cancellation and asked us to come in right away. This was good news! We hustled around and as we were heading out the door Garrett gave a big sigh and firmly stated “Well, daddy. I’ve got another bull to ride. Let’s go.” What a warrior attitude!

During the preparation he began to show his trepidation in earnest as a tear slowly rolled down his cheek and he said again that he just wanted to go home. But true to form, he stayed the course but demanded that he had his Ralph bear and something of Jessi’s with him when he went in. He said he wanted his baby sister by his side.

One of the surgical nurses came in and gave him a cocktail to settle his nerves and that helped. She told us that Garrett is well known there and they have discussed his distaste for needles. Apparently, during a past biopsy, Garrett came around as they were about to start the procedure and “decked” one of the operating room staff. She laughed and said “that boy really hates to see anyone come at him with a needle”. Garrett never remembered that and none of us knew that story until today. Wow! Now that’s a warrior mindset. Folks, it's just not safe to approach a wounded bobcat! Ok, nurses. Whadyalearn?

I gowned up for the trip into the surgery room and we made the long, short walk. When I laid him on the table today and they put the sleepy mask over his mouth, he looked up at me and the tears flowed. I leaned in very close, took that first tear and softly sang “I can only imagine” to him until he fell asleep. It never gets any easier.

When Kathy and I walked out into the waiting room we were met there with a beautiful surprise. Nicholas Greenwood’s mom and dad had come down from Ft. Collins to be with us. This is the incredible family I’ve written about in the past, who lost Nicholas in 2008 and unselfishly donated his organs to other children. We spent the next few hours with them catching up and were so very blessed by their company. Nick’s dad, Bill, joined us all in prayer for Garrett and it was truly a “God” moment. They are so inspirational. They started a non-profit, Christian based athletic program to honor Nick and call it G.R.I.T. See it at http://www.gritwrestling.com/
We're truly grateful for their company today. What an amazing family.

When the procedure was done, the doctor came out to us. The fears we had were calmed when she spoke, and Kathy finally stopped shaking. Garrett did great, and his heart is healing. The coronary arteries look fantastic and three chambers of his heart are functioning very well. One of the left chambers is producing really high filling pressures, which over time if not corrected can cause issues with his lungs. But the doctors are not surprised, because he was so sick. They think he would have registered at about a 21 pressure a month ago, but they couldn’t do the cath then as it was unsafe. Today he was measured at 14. The target range is 3 to 4. This could explain the still increased heart rate. She said it could take up to a year to recover fully based on what they see, and reiterated that he was very sick when we first came in. They don’t even do a biopsy and cath procedure as a general rule for most rejections, but Garrett’s was so significant that we needed to do this to be sure he is healing.

All we’re waiting for now are the results of the biopsy itself. That will tell us how the cells look microscopically and let us know the damage the cells may have, and/or if the lymphocytes are playing nice now. We’ll know maybe as early as tomorrow, but no later than Monday. Again, we are faithfully confident that the results will be positive.

When Garrett came around today he was in a lot of pain and had a very sore throat from being intubated. He threw up really hard and that didn’t make it any easier on him, but all he could muster to ask was “what were my numbers” and “when can we go home”. I’m very proud of his demeanor today. He just doesn't weaken. He really is a tough little cowboy. When he was awake later and understood what the doctors saw today, he said “well, I guess I scored a 99 on Bodacious today”. Bodacious was the badest of the bad rodeo bulls for many years.

After 2.5 hours in surgery and several more recovering, Garrett was able to keep food down and get released to go back to his aunt’s house. He has to wear a Holter monitor for 24 hours. It’s a portable device about the size of a walkman that records electrical impulses of his heart function because there’s still the chance that his heart rhythms were disrupted by the procedure today.

Just before he went to sleep tonight, Garrett asked me “daddy, why wasn’t I born normal”. That’s another one of those questions I just don’t have answers to. No earthly man does. Only God alone knows the reasons for the way things are, and the way they will be. Why did Darren go home? Why did Nicholas go home? Why was Megan go home? All we can do is to be committed to the belief that God’s plan is perfect. Garrett was chosen to be a very special child for reasons only known to God. When he then asked if being special meant having to go through pain, all I could do was relate the pain that Jesus went through for us and how He is the most special man who ever lived. He never promised it would be easy. He just promised it would be worth it.

My son is traveling a trail that most will never know. I'm blessed to follow him because I do believe God is using him for something truly great. He has already done more for God in his short life than I could ever imagine. The blessings we’ve received throughout the journey, the support system, spiritual connections and miracles are often more than I am really able to comprehend. It hasn’t been all fun, but it sure is a remarkable voyage.

When we know more, I promise to share.

JD

3 comments:

Vpatt said...

So very happy that the new is positive. Garrett shows more courage than most grown ups!!! My loving thoughts and prayers continue to be you all.
Victoria

Christy said...

God is good, all the time! So glad to hear the great news. The boys and I were doing our devotional yesterday morning, right after Gavin talked to Garrett and it really made us think about him and how remarkable he is. I am sharing this because of his question of why he wasn't born normal. I just want to share it with you. God likes the way He made you. "My frame was not hidden from You when I was being formed in secret intricately and curiously wrought in the depths of the earth." Psalm 139:15 Have you ever asked God, "Why did you make me this way?" Sometimes the things we think are our worst faults, God will use to His greatest glory: "But who you are, a mere man, to criticize and contradict and answer back to God? Will what is formed say to him that formed it, Why have you made me thus?" Romans 9:20 Jesus died so that we might enjoy our life in abundance and to the fullest until it overflows. You are not going to enjoy life if you don't enjoy yourseld. Be satisfied with yourself, and celebrate the unique way God made you.
Have a great day...we love you guys!

Unknown said...

Garrett truly has TRUE GRIT. An your faith, JD, is both a legacy from your family and an inspiration. Fritz would be proud of you and your son. You Texas cousins are praying for y'all and looking forward to celebrating with you when you receive the good news.