March 7, 2008

March 7

Sometimes it's hard to find the words to express the feelings of emotion and complete sense of our insignificance in His perfect plan. The overwhelming support we recieve from all of you reminds us of how the love of our Heavenly Father can reach so many through the life of a single child. There are times when we need to be reminded of this when there are no earthly answers for why some children must endure so much pain. This hospital is full of these little miracles. There is no doubt that no other life on earth can bring so many people to their knees in search of Him. Through the hard times, I find comfort in knowing that their challenges serve to keep us in touch with the only One who can make it all better.

Today was a very difficult one on Garrett. The medicine they are using to treat him caused adverse problems and he suffered tremendously until they could counteract the reaction. He's going to have these bumps that cause a lot of fear, but the end result will be worth the struggle. It has to be. By about 1030 tonight, Garrett was finally feeling a little better and wanted something to eat. His color was returning to a relatively normal shade, his blood pressure had come down some and he was breathing more normally. And mommy and daddy could start breathing a little easier, too. Jessi took if pretty hard as she cannot stand to see her brother suffer. Fortunately, he only has one more treatment of this up front and his body will have enough of the antibodies he needs to guard against some possible rejection issues. We knew up front that there is a chance of very serious side effects, we only hope today is not a sign of things to come.

On a much brighter note, we were blessed with a couple of promising housing options today that will give us the opportunity to relocate near the hospital. They seem life they will offer a safe and friendly environment that will help Garrett emotionally over the next several months, and give me peace of mind that my family is safe when I have to leave them and handle my responsibilities at work.

Our Pastor and a very close friend also came to visit and their timing was perfect. We needed the calming distraction, and the much needed necessities from home that were delivered. The doctors also said that even with today's set back, Garrett is actually ahead of the game and should be able to leave intensive care soon for a "step down" unit. Each day he takes on the fight, and each night we give thanks for another victory...one more day closer to being home.

When watching him sleep last night, I couldn't help but be reminded of a beautiful prayer that Mother Theresa used to say as one of her daily reflections. I look at him and see the face of Jesus.

Dear Jesus, Help me spread Thy Fragrance everywhere I go. Flood my soul with Thy Spirit and Love. Penetrate and possess my whole being so utterly that all my life may only be a radiance of Thine. Shine through me and be so in me that every life I come in contact with may feel Thy presence in my soul. Let them look up and no longer see me but only Jesus. Stay with me and then I shall begin to shine as You shine, so to shine as to be a light to others.

More soon. JD